No one likes a whiny baby of an adult. Do not get me wrong sometimes you have to vent and complain about unfair and unscrupulous situations in your life. With everything there is a limit, you cannot complain forever. At some point you have to solve your problems and surpass the unfairness in your life with your own strength.
People that complain too much are usually the ones that tend to be poor problem solvers. Though this is not absolute, though it can be said if you are complaining of the same problem for weeks, months from the time you originally brought it up. Then you have a poor problem solving rate.
If you do not solve your problems they will not disappear, they just stagnant or get worse, I used to be one when I was younger. Solving the problems in my life was not something I did. So I was still mentally thinking like a baby.
You know when babies cry it’s to get your attention, whether that of itself or to direct you to something they need. It is the same thing in adult life, we complain to friends, loved ones to gain some sort of reaction maybe a emotional response, a action even.
But this starts a process where we lay some if not all the burden of a problem on the someone we are expressing the complaint to. If it is emotional support the burden is shared. If it is a action you seek when you complain, then depending on the situation you probably shifting the whole burden on them.
Like when a wife complains to a husband about a broken facet, it does not need to be asked. It is implied that the husband should fix it, his next response should indicate to her when he will be available from his busy schedule to do this.
The thing is complaining serves that purpose but misused and overused it makes said persons seem like adult babies to be honest. They essentially cannot do anything for their selves, they need someone else damn even you might get caught up in it from time to time.
To be honest I get complaints all the time and I make myself available whether it be for emotional support or physical action if need be.
But it gets annoying when a certain person complains to you about somebody in their life repeatedly. Like a woman complaining about their boyfriend or family member.
There is a logic I call respecting your worth, if you in it, you want it, if you do not want it, leave it be. You do not have to accept crap from anyone. Your role on earth is to satisfy yourself nothing more, if the person in your life is not satisfying you enough, leave them be.
As far as problems like something in your life, your job, something broken in your house, something you need, something you need to fix. Get it done, part of complaining is that you recognize there is a problem, once recognized figure out how to fix it, then fix it. Put it in your schedule of things to do.
Same goes with people, we all have to live together but even cultural and personality differences will be glaring. Try to find compromise with the people in your life. Find common ground and work towards the goal both of you seek.
Point is when you complain, do what needs to be done to solve the problem or the pain of the problem. Life is unfair and hard, yes. But do not let it pull you into a cycle of immobility as you complain, complain, complain. Complain but do something about it after.
David Shaw is a certified nerd and scum of the earth. Jamaican by birth, he enjoys long walks and the simple things in life. He is also an entrepreneur, writer and graphic designer. Support him on Patreon Check out his work on his website or follow his mundane madness on twitter @davidcs_aw, google, pinterest