Understanding Women

woman and men

“Do you like me?”

She laughs.

“You are beautiful.”

She smiles.

“I want you.”

She asks why.

“We should be together.”

She smiles and looks away.

Men wonder why women do not look at them or consider them worth their time. Well, that might not be your fault or because they think themselves better than you. Woman, the mystery men try to figure out. To be honest I used to like many men found women strange. When in actuality they were not. When did I realize this, the more I talked to females, the more I realize they and males are not that dissimilar.

The difference is how we are grown, the expectations of each gender when you grow up. Please note this is brutal version of those expectations not the politically correct ones. Men are grown to have as many women within a 5 mile radius, have a child of blood relation (does not need to in wedlock), get married and still have another woman on the side. Women are grown to not have their sex life public news (even if they have 3 boyfriends), be independent, be married and have children, be able to cook and take care of all home duties.

I think that’s accurate, no?  It might be different in some cultures and countries, anyways that just the gist of it. To be honest females like males are affected by these constraints and expectations. We all are. We look at them differently, some show middle fingers to it, some desire them as well, while some prefer living life waiting on the right moment or person.

Personally I went through much heartache appealing to women. Failing in the process thinking to myself maybe the problem was me. When In actuality I was just not the guy they were looking for. It was just not the right time or maybe I said the wrong thing.

Yes, we as men think saying anything will get us far. If a random woman just walks up to me and wants to have sex with me. Considering the knowledge I have attained and the situation I might not take that offer.

Men can be sneaky so can woman. I remember a case a friend of mine had a woman chasing him around. He did not take her offer because he was not attracted to her like that. Two weeks later he found out she was pregnant.

More or less, he was found out he was not the only one she was chasing to have sex with. He confronted her about it and she told him she was not sure her current boyfriend would accept the baby. She was planning to throw the baby on a guy. A seemingly more responsible one in her opinion, funny the current boyfriend actually accepted the baby with open arms, figures right?

Now this is not an attack on women. Let us be real men have done more damage overall than women. That might be the problem at first sight. At the end of the day many women get a lot of attention anyways. It is normal for some to have long lists of men that they can draft pick from when their last relationship fails.

So when you and me approach, why should they needlessly bother to appease us? Unless we are the ideal guy from first glance, they might give us a negative response and not even bother.

Some might not be so cold and give us a chance as long as we do not ruin it. But that depends, the same method does not work for every person. Each women is not the same, being candid might not work with some. Like using jokes and one liners might not work with others.

If you fail, accept it and move on. Women fill the globe it is not the end of the world. Also it helps if you actually talk to women on a regular. No, not asking women out or talking about sex. Talk to women about themselves. Ask them about how they think, what they desire, what they believe in.

You will realize they think just like males on most things, see no mystery to them at all. The more you know about women and their habits and desires the more you are likely to understand them.

Understanding makes it easier to know what to say to a person. Understanding is the hallmark of a good human being. You cannot ask much of someone you do not understand.


David Shaw is a certified nerd and scum of the earth.
Jamaican by birth, he enjoys long walks and the simple things in life.
He is also an entrepreneur, writer and graphic designer.
Support him on Patreon
Check out his work on his website or follow his mundane madness on twitter @davidcs_aw, google, pinterest

 

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Understanding Women

Hardships of Entrepreneurship

Entrepreneur

Entrepreneurship is hard and I can attest. But the rewards I want for myself are more of a need than a want. Like many Jamaicans who cannot afford normal life, but better than most who have no chance. This chance, I am taking it. Because to waste opportunity is one thing I learned not to do. Slipping up in life is not a option, I may never get these chances again.

What can I say the typical 9 to 5 job does not do much for me as it concerns my expenses. I have cut my expenses so much that food is meticulously measured. I do not eat often, some days I would eat only once per day just to save money for important future use. My mother eats though but she would prefer much more than that. She is used to grand meals when my father was working. Those days are gone now.

Going through phases of sadness and worry as time chips away, the axe of poverty making its way to the end of my life. Faith in myself falters from time to time. Was I being weak, because when I see these entrepreneurs I aspire to become such as Richard Branson and Mark Cuban, I do not see no weakness only positivity.

While I was searching for information to write a new lesson on entrepreneurship for my website I found this article on depression in entrepreneurs. Realizing that I was not alone in this constant anxiety. This and a conversation with my ex-girlfriend showed me that my mental turmoil was really created by me.

Assumptions seem to prove this why many people fake it and act like it is ok, because if they were to consider it deeply, they might lose heart and kill themselves. We have to think positively until the situation changes. Only we can make our situation change. Because the thing that I tend to forget at times is that if I was not positive my motivation to change my situation would be poor.

My positivity is the reason I am pushing myself so much and so far. At the end of the day I believe I can become the greatest entrepreneur in the world and lift my country out of its dismal position by myself, no politics, no dishonesty, no criminality. Positivity keeps me running. Dreams give me goals to run to. The financial situation gives me a reminder of what I have and what I do not have, so I can plan my run.

People would ask me why bother, I ask why not. I have so much ideas and ways I can help Jamaica. Dreams I want to achieve. In a 9 to 5 job I only work, barely any grand dreams can be archived there. The country has untapped potential, I am tired of waiting for the day when my wage can pay for my living. Because that will not happen. The truth, countries raise the minimum wage to compensate for inflation and cost of living meaning by the time you get a raise you have higher expenses anyways.

Why work for people, when I can work for myself. Sit back and count money. No, those last words were serious. There are many methods of passive income such as investments, sale of digital goods, website adsense etc. Naturally, they require some initial work and a little bit of maintenance. But trust me some of these methods allow their smart originator to literally sit back and count money.

This is what I am trying to focus on for myself as the time passes. Coming this far, I have sacrificed much, but to give up now is harder now. If something does not work I try something else but the goal has not changed. To be able to take care of my family and live happily. I made my decision long ago, I cannot turn back from it. So would you give up after so long? Stay strong, also if you go through this yourself and need someone to talk to, I am available at my email, twitter or google +. Thank you for reading.


David Shaw is a certified nerd and scum of the earth. Jamaican by birth, he enjoys long walks and the simple things in life. He is also an entrepreneur, writer and graphic designer. You can follow his mundane madness on twitter @davidcs_aw

Hardships of Entrepreneurship

Discipline-How I Walked Into It

walking in nature

People ask me how I am able to have money in my pocket and still walk a few miles, just to save the taxi or bus fare that I would have spent to go there. It baffles them to some extent, where with me I am unfazed by the idea of walking several miles, actually it has become a fun past time for me now. I do it almost all the time now, except when the distance gets around 10 miles and I have to get there early, otherwise, I putting foot to asphalt.

I would normally walk short distances when I was young in preference to getting to my destination by vehicle. So the basic tolerance for walking was already instilled in me from youth. But walking 1 mile as a youth to walking 20 miles in a tropical country like Jamaica, worst on a hungry stomach as an adult is a big leap in tolerance. The only reason this habit started was because I was broke and jobless three years back.

There were times I would forsake spending the money not knowing what tomorrow held for me. I remember a time when I had no money, I had ate nothing from the day before and had to walk to Spanish Town from Portmore (5 KM) just to get money from my father. I looked at the money pocketed it and walked back.

When I started volunteering, It was a little better, but money was low in those times still. So if I could make it, I would walk. When I had to go somewhere I had to ask myself what was more important a nice ride to my location or food on the table tomorrow, I chose food on a table.

I kept making decisions like that for a while, it was only the really long distances that would convince me to drop my stubbornness and pay for public transportation. As I walked more and more my tolerances and discipline increased hence my distances increased.

Time passed and I got a better job, I could easily afford to pay for transportation to wherever I wanted to go now. But I still walked, now at this point, I had already decided to become a entrepreneur. One thing I knew before walking into being an entrepreneur was that how I utilized my cash flow could make and break my efforts especially since I had to take care of my family on top of that. I could not waste opportunity or money.

So I did not, since I had already attained a good tolerance for walking, I kept up the discipline that I amassed so far. In time my tolerance rose until walking from Portmore to Spanish Town was not a struggle it was fun and very scenic.

Naturally, there were times I bruised the bottom of my feet. I even got bad feelings in the pit of stomach when I walked that I had to stop, but even with money in my pocket I would get back up after a while and walk on. Because that mindset was branded in me to such a level that it was harder for me to go into my pocket than walk in pain. Hell, I pretty much smiled at it.

Since I am trying to stay healthy, walking has become one of my exercise routines. So no pain no gain, I welcomed it. I would step out of my house just to walk, how far and where to….well that depends on my mood. I would walk to specific landmarks, maybe one or two, speed was not important unless I have business there. Rarely do I stop unless something happens to me, which is also rare.

I have never counted the amount of money I have saved not using public transportation. But I realized it is large and it makes me glad to know I have such control over my own behavior. Many people do not have such self-control and splurge away their resources. I did not because I know how hard I worked for it and would need it later.

Granted I am not perfect I still get lazy at times in some areas but my finances are tightly controlled by disciplined goals and behaviors to aid it.

· I walk to avoid paying for public transportation

· I do not buy food at fast food establishments or restaurants, I cook my lunch and carry it.

· I learned to cook my food and do not buy processed food that are relatively expensive and have little use value.

The areas I need to make up in would be my time management, but I am making good progress on that also. I have learned many things about discipline so let me label and expand on them below.

GROWING TOLERANCE

Thinking about it, I have come to realize that discipline and tolerance is something that grows, you cannot just get it like that. You have to practice it to amass the tolerance over some time, so when you have to call on it, it will answer. Because if I never did walking regularly, if I had no money would I walk 15 miles to go somewhere important, no I would probably say “There is no way I can go, might as well wait until I can get some money”.

While my current self would be like “No money….ok I’ll walk” Trust me, I would enjoy the walk up there.

PURPOSING YOUR DISCIPLINE WITH A GOAL

Why are you putting yourself through this? With me it was to save money, but that became kind of meaningless after a while, so i gave it a new purpose, good health. I was trying to keep my body in tip-top shape, so I took the walk as exercise. A discipline becomes more meaningful to you if you have a goal behind it. Especially an important one that you want to achieve.

LITTLE STEPS AT A TIME

One of the most important lessons I learned was the small steps logic. Many small achievements and steps are more important one big one. Why you ask? It shows a long track record of your actual progress in a certain area, this means you can see the development over a period of time. Why you think employers hire skilled or experienced workers over fresh university graduated candidates?

All university graduates have is a piece of paper which certifies knowledge in the field, but skilled and experienced workers usually come in with recommendations, vocational certificates, experiences working some important companies, achievements in important projects done with companies they worked at or with. They have a much more reliable record of their skills, because a employer can see how the applicant has developed over a period of time.

The same logic applies to discipline if I started big, I would lose heart much more easily and never complete. This why many drop out of university. If your university graduate focus on the smaller things like the projects you participated in and great things you did in university. Saying you got a degree is not an achievement, it is what you did to get the degree that would be of value to employer. I started off with short distances at first, until I could tolerate the longer distances.

Because of my record I can measure how well I have progressed and use it as motivation. “I did 2 miles this week, next week 3 miles!” You would just grow it like that. Focus on taking small leaps watch the success, before you know it you reach the big goal because you focused more dealing with the small tasks to get towards the big goal.

Discipline is something you work up to, we all have the willpower within us. So will you take that challenge and make that effort?


David Shaw is a certified nerd and scum of the earth. Jamaican by birth, he enjoys long walks and the simple things in life. He is also an entrepreneur, writer and graphic designer. You can follow his mundane madness on twitter @davidcs_aw

Discipline-How I Walked Into It

To Risk or Not To Risk

take a chance or play it safe

Risk is not one of my friends. I prefer meticulous analysis and the resourceful decision making that comes with it. I did not use to make risky decisions, most of my decisions in the past were very safe I must say. But when you have a life like mine and dreams like mine it usually helps to throw some risk into the mix.

But not many people realize that any form of risk can have one of two significant elements that if not quantified will lead to your downfall. I have learned that missing up one is not too bad but missing up both makes the risk a pointless venture and I am glad I know now. The two elements are how accurately you can measure the chances of success and the consequences of the offset outcomes. Where a disadvantage can lie if the risk is either hard to measure and the outcomes lend towards your further doom.

To illustrate risk with irrelevant outcomes I am going to use the riskiest thing on the planet, gambling. I used to gamble then I started taking it seriously and studied it, then I realized why the companies that put these lotteries still make an island load of money regardless of the fact of someone possibly winning a big jackpot and many people winning mini jackpots every day. The bets are hedged toward the house you are not suppose to win, meaning your chance is so low for the big jackpot, thousands to millions play almost no one wins (technically 70-99% of the time depending).

The lower chance games give very little money it makes no relevance, especially when you played multiple times just to win that small amount one time. You cannot cover all possible bets either by buying many slips with many different arrangements of numbers because trust me when I tell you they predicted that.

They either make the winnings so low you cannot do it more than a certain amount (then you would just be surpassing your threshold lose money even if you win) and/or increase the numbers you choose so it is like trying to decipher the matrix. Then you have to take in consideration again the fact of playing multiple times just to win one time. All the money spent before add up, you did not win you lose trust me.

That illustration was to show risk where the outcomes spell doom either way unless you have the luck of the Irish. But that risk of success is easily measured, hey it is even printed on the bet slips, the odds of you winning. What about risk you cannot measure, well such risk is more common when human beings are involved. This is why economics, which is a science, ends up being one of the most inaccurate sciences around. Because measuring human behavior accurately is like measuring the weight of some sand with a ruler.

It is not possible plain and simple, so since you cannot measure the processes and extenuating circumstances that rely heavily on humans accurately. You can only guess the outcomes, at least with the lottery you know the outcome you either win or lose. When people are involved the outcomes tend to blur between good and bad, it also depends on whom you are talking to. So the consequences tend to be just as good as they are bad. As some people value seemingly bad things as good, vice versa.

But guessing these consequences is difficult I must say due to current and changing trends in the culture, attitudes, demographic, wealth of the people and the business climate. So we use the next best thing, the past. Yup that is right folks, history is the real secret to the power of marketing professionals, economists and business leaders.

Study the past behavior and events of people and you will be able to guess more accurately how will people behave and what is most likely to happen next. Just like when there is financial uncertainty in a country the natural reaction is fear which cause people to withdraw their investments, hence stocks fall, they spend less, hence demand falls leading to lesser goods being bought, more pressure on the business as they make less money etc.

So when governments make their economic decisions it is laden in risk as people may not react and do the exact thing they are inclined to do. Like how my government of Jamaica is promoting entrepreneurship and using policies to help MSMEs (Micro-small- and medium-sized enterprises.) grow. They have not been successful due to a few reasons.

  1. Many banks and small loan businesses have been resistant to providing loans to this sector of society, their behavior really is caused by fear that the investment in an unknown starter business might not pan out well or default.

  2. There is a lack of appreciation for doing business on the legal level due to the relative cost of starting a typical brick and mortar business.

  3. Instead of many young businesses starting, mature businesses are only getting bigger because they are the ones mostly getting loans.

  4. To fill the void left in many underserved and/or costly services, many unregulated businesses have started up, some are not healthy to the populace in general (subpar products, services etc).

This is not what they planned, but it happened anyway. Looks like a domino effect, happening one after the other. Well, this has happened before in some variety in other countries in the past and currently, they could have predicted this but that does not mean they know how to change it effectively. As one method tried in one country might not work in yours, as the cultures are different and the extenuating circumstances would likely be different.

So it is both a case study on how they do it and how to apply it. Politicians then run the risk of offsetting a new problem or a current one being worsened with that policy. This is why politicians try to promote and encourage the people to push the country themselves. Rather than them getting involved, they would make law and legislation that retroactively, influence people to do certain actions. Because if it fails, it is their fault and they are removed in the next election.

Risk is around us and ahead of us, we have to try to make as much sense of it and not jump in without a lifeboat. To be honest, it might not help or it might help, regardless the more you study the risk you going into, the higher likelihood you will know it is worthless or you cannot handle it. If you can and you want, go right ahead. Good luck.


David Shaw is a certified nerd and scum of the earth. Jamaican by birth, he enjoys long walks and the simple things in life. He is also an entrepreneur, writer and graphic designer. You can follow his mundane madness on twitter @davidcs_aw

To Risk or Not To Risk